Etta Rae Byrd
May 2, 2017
7 pounds, 10 ounces
21 1/4 inches
Dear Lyla and Simon,
We are about five weeks away from welcoming your new sibling into our family and your mama is basically counting down the days (and hoping the countdown is a littler shorter than that).
Man, do I feel guilty admitting that.
I really don’t want to wish away the last few weeks that we have together as a family of four. We are in a great groove right now. We’ve figured out schedules that work for us. We’re happy.
But, babies, I’m a much better mom when I’m not pregnant.
As we near the end of this pregnancy, I find myself feeling guilty all the time.
Like when you ask me to chase you around the coffee farm and I can’t.
When all you want is to be held but my swollen body is just too tired to hold you for another minute.
When I skip out on family trips to the playground so I can have a few minutes in silence with my feet up.
When you tell me your belly hurts and my initial thought is “oh no, I don’t have the energy to be up all night”.
The bigger my belly gets, the shorter my fuse becomes. My nightly prayers are filled with cries to the Lord for more patience.
I start each day with the best intentions, and I almost always feel like I come up short.
It’s those times when I feel like a terrible mom. Like I’m failing you both.
But, somehow, you both know just when I need you to crawl into my lap for the extra snuggles. When I can’t break up another fight in the car so, instead, you hold hands. Your sweet little hearts are so loving and forgiving and I am beyond grateful for that.
I know I’ll have hard days when there are three of you running around the house. With each new stage there will be an adjustment period. I will never be a perfect mom, but with the complications from this pregnancy behind me, I know I will be able to do a better job than I am doing now. Because, babies, I’m a much better mom when I’m not pregnant.
Thank you for loving me always. For reminding me on a daily basis what sweet, loving beings you are. I can’t wait to see you in your new roles as big brother and sister (again!).
I Love You,
One year ago, after a quick Thanksgiving lunch at auntie’s, we checked into the hospital. Later that night, we welcomed our sweet Simon Earl into our world.
Just like when Lyla turned one, I am blown away by how fast a year can pass. How quickly they transform from this…
Our little “bubs” has rounded out our family in the most perfect way. His sweet disposition almost immediately put to rest all of the fears and anxiety that I had about adding another baby to the mix.
From the get-go he showed us that the old saying “boys are wired different than girls” is SO true. I am constantly amazed at how different the two of them are from the way that they play with their toys to their physical and mental development.
Mister Simon is an explorer. He is so curious about his world and spends lots of time everyday examining his surroundings.
He loves us all but Daddy is a clear favorite.
Simon can give kisses and high fives. He also says “hot”
He scoots around and gets where he needs to be. Just before we put him to bed last night decided to stand up and play with a toy unassisted.
He has the cheesiest, most contagious smile.
Simon loves to play with his sister. Until she takes a toy from him (which is almost always, we’re working on it). He fights back by pulling her hair.
He is a champion sleeper at night. Naps are a different story.
Our boy scoots toy trains and cars around the house making the cutest little motor noise you’ll ever hear. And he loves groovin’ to music. Doesn’t matter which kind.
He is a nature boy. Has loved looking at trees since our trip to Michigan this summer and still points them out on walks and hikes.
He is also a sports guy. Give him a ball, throw the King’s game on TV and he is good to go.
Simon is so easy going and is a great sport about being tagged along on Lyla’s playdates and such.
My sweet boy,
I am so thankful that God put you in our lives. You have already brought so much happiness to the world in this short year. Being at your side while you learn and grow is an amazing gift. I love you “bubs”. Happy first birthday!
Too often I hear other moms tell me that they are afraid to take their kids out on their own. Whether it be on a trip to the grocery store or a day at the beach they will wait until they can go with a friend/spouse/on their own.
To an extent, I get it. I really do.
Toddlers are overwhelming. Wiggly babies who don’t want to sit in the cart while you shop are frustrating. Simple errands take double, maybe even triple the time that they used to.
But mama, don’t be afraid…
…of being outnumbered || Before having Simon I wondered how I would ever go out in public with two babies. Two of them > one of me. I’m not very good at math but I know I at least got that down. I quickly learned that it is very unrealistic for me to wait until Alex is home to do things like grocery shopping while still being able to prepare meals and enjoy time together as a family so, I just dove right in. Sometimes, we double stroller. Sometimes, Lyla walks and Simon is in the Ergo. Sometimes, I’ve got a crying baby pulling my hair on one hip and a limb-flailing toddler on the other…you know, whatever works.
…of your kids crying || Kids cry. This isn’t news to anyone. They cry in their carseats. They cry in the stroller. They cry because their shoes aren’t sparkly enough. They cry because they hear other kids crying. You get the picture. As long as you’ve made sure they are fed, changed and not in any sort of pain just try to drown it out. Easier said than done, I know, but sometimes you’ve just gotta let the choir sing!
…of tantrums in the store || Gosh, these can be embarrassing. You will probably get some looks, maybe even a comment or two, but hey – tantrums happen! It’s part of the game. This is your chance to teach your kids what sort of behavior is acceptable in public and what is not. Are they going to listen the first time? Probably not (unless you are really effective, and in that case, sign me up for the first copy of your parenting book!). Will your child throw another tantrum the next time you don’t let them open three bags of Goldfish before you even leave the snack aisle? Probably. Just take a deep breath, stick to your guns and roll with it.
…of being tired || It took me two and a half years but I have finally resigned to the the fact that I will never feel rested again. Between the kids and the house and the dog and the husband (kidding, babe) there are simply not enough hours in the day. It’s easy to brush off invites to fun outings or playdates when you are feeling “tired” but don’t let that be a reason for missing out on life anymore! Yes, you are tired. So is every other mama, so pour yourself a mug of coffee and get out there. At least you will be in good company 😉
…of being unprepared || One of the hardest things for me about having two kids is how disorganized I feel ALL THE TIME. On a recent outing, Simon had a huge blowout. No big deal, right? Right. Until I realized that I didn’t have any diapers OR wipes in my backpack. I was carrying around this big backpack, that I swore I had packed full of essentials (and backups…and backups for the backups) that morning, for no reason because it was empty. So, I took Simon into the ladies room, wet some paper towels to wipe up the mess and then made a makeshift diaper with a bunch of wadded up toilet paper. Definitely not my proudest moment as a mother but it did get the job done and did not interrupt our family fun time.
…to ask for help || I am not superwoman. You are not superwoman (I don’t think so, anyway). Sometimes you are going to need help. In those moments, you are going to be cursing under your breath wondering why you ever tried to get out in the first place. You are going to vow to never do it again. But, in these times don’t be afraid to ask for help. Wherever you are, chances are that a lot of the people around you are parents too. They get it. They want to help. Don’t be shy.
Don’t let the fear hold you back.
Get out there. Enjoy life. Embrace your gifts.
Laugh off the crazy.
This season of life is going fast. Too fast. Before you know it, we will be meandering through the aisles at Target alone and wishing we had some little crazy people in our carts (OK, maybe not – solo Target does sound pretty fab 😉 )
Make memories. Take photos.
Smile, laugh, and dance with your kids.
Thank your spouse for these beautiful gifts. For this precious time.
Lean on your friends when you need some help. We all do.
Don’t be afraid, mama. You’ve got this.
Because I’m feeling nostalgic and Lyla is about to turn two.
Little Simon Earl entered the world on Thanksgiving Day.
He hasn’t even been with us a full two weeks but, already, I can’t remember our lives without him. He has brought us joy beyond measure and I feel so lucky to be his mama. While I can’t say that our family is complete, I can tell you that it feels more whole and that is such a wonderful feeling.
In the past week I have drafted and deleted his birth story over and over. For some reason, the words never seem quite right, the details suddenly seem unimportant. So, instead, I’ve decided to give you the photo edition of his birth story (no gory shots, promise) and answer the most asked questions quickly at the end.
Simon Earl Byrd (named after two of his great-grandparents)
November 26, 2015
8 pounds, 2 ounces || 20.5 inches
All-natural, unmedicated birth.
Sleeps and eats great.
Has a great big sister who is helpful and loving.
God is good.